Celebrated Lives

November 2003

Thank you for all the assistance that you gave me last year with my husband. When Bob was dying of cancer, you were there to help me in the last six months of his life and you are still there for me. . As you know his dying wish was to be at home with me and Bear (our 13 year old Newfie dog).

Well with all the help I got with the hospital bed, linen, the wheelchair loan, volunteers and moral support I got from Hospice, I was able to keep Bob, my husband, home with me. He used to tell me when I came home from work about the volunteer that came and sat with him. He enjoyed many conversations with them. One even brought us a couple of homemade preserves as Bob had mentioned how much he liked homemade things. They seemed to go out of their way to be kind and gentle with him.

This was a big change for us since we were very private people and then all of sudden we had to have strangers coming into our home and we had to depend on strangers. Well, they may have been strangers when they first came in but they certainly became a part of our family shortly after.

I do not know how I could possibly repay your kindness. Even after Bob's death your volunteers and staff keep in touch with me. I feel that if I ever need someone to talk to I know where to go.

I always speak of your kindness to people at work and tell them that if the day ever came that they need support for a sick member of their family that Hospice is the place to go. Again I want to Thank You and God Bless you for your caring.

Your Friend,
A Wife

August 12, 2004

My husband David was diagnosed with terminal cancer in August 2003. He was 26 years old. It was during this first month that David and I first became acquainted with the staff and volunteers of Hospice. You immediately came to our aid with guidance and support. The experience and insight offered by the volunteer's and staff helped us cope with initial days of shock and grief. Your continued involvement aided David and I, as well as our families, by providing much needed moral support, guidance and friendship.

David died on January 8, 2004.

The support we received from Hospice came in many forms, including; encouragement, conversation, warm blankets, comforting food, friendship, and sometimes just a warm knowing smile. David's parents, who were from Mexico and spoke only Spanish, were overwhelmed by the support and the kindness they received during their time with David. Even with the language barrier, the staff and volunteers of your agency managed to spend time with them, cried with them, offered them friendship, as well as some Christmas presents as they were far from their home. David's father was continually amazed at how supported he felt.

Given David's young age and the fact that I grew up in this City, we were both very fortunate to have been surrounded by many friends and family during this most difficult time in our lives. Staff from your agency would check in on us regularly, but were very respectful of our space and individual needs. We were not completely dependent on your agency for support, but were happy to receive it. For those with very little family support your agency would be indispensable.

The support we received made the dying process less scary for both of us. David and I would often count our many blessings, even in the last days of his life, and the support we received was at the top of our list. I can't count the number of times David said thank you to staff on a daily basis, and when I think about our stay the last two months of his life, these two words stand out for me, and for that I am very grateful. David felt comfortable to talk with staff and volunteers about his fears of dying and his philosophy of life. David had a gift with being honest about his feelings and staff was always receptive and really listened to him.

Being in the helping profession myself and offering grief support to others is part of my job description. Through my experience with Hospice I learned many skills which I believe will make me better at my own profession. The excellent care and support provided by Hospice will be forever ingrained in my mind. You helped me through the most difficult time in my life and thank you hardly seems enough.

It is my belief that the services that Hospice provides to the community are indispensable and are extremely deserving of recognition and support.

Sincerely,
A Wife

September 7, 2005

In May of this year my grandfather, Patrick, was admitted to the hospital with cancer of the liver. Within a few weeks it was determined that the cancer had spread throughout his body and he was given only two months to live. This diagnosis was very sudden and, as you can surely imagine, hit our family very hard.

My grandfather passed away on July 8, 2005.

Our family will be eternally grateful that the man we all loved and cherished was able to spend the final lag of his journey under the care of your agency. The care and understanding of the staff and volunteers went above and beyond the call of duty and will forever be remembered. In a time of great sadness, we were able to seek solace in knowing that my grandfather’s comfort was of top priority.

I recall my mother and several others members of our family commenting on the incredible support that was provided by your agency throughout his stay in the hospital. The literature explaining the process of death was incredibly informative and allowed us to prepare, as much as is humanly possible, for the inevitable. The counseling services were superior and so very readily accessible. Your entire network of support was incredibly appreciated by every visitor, and most especially by my granddad.

When my grandfather was medically discharged from the hospital’s active care floor, our family was very distressed that he was being asked to leave the hospital at this critical time in his illness. When I called you for help, your agency immediately came to our rescue. Your staff worked with the hospital staff to find him a place in the Palliative Care Unit where he could spend his final days and hours with loved ones in an atmosphere that was a virtual home. The hospital’s Palliative Care Unit offered an environment of comfort and expert medical care. Your agency’s staff and volunteers were always there to listen and care and helped to make this difficult time much easier for all of us.

As time goes on and our family begins to heal, I will continue to remember the extraordinary contribution your agency makes to patients, families and friends. I know your work is an endless cycle and a precious gift to those facing the end of life. Just last week, my grandmother received a follow-up call from your agency to find out how she was doing, and this is a true testament to your dedication to be there until the very end, and even beyond.

On behalf of myself and my family, I wish to thank the staff and volunteers of your agency from the very bottom of my heart.

Sincerely,
A Granddaughter

September 29, 2006

One of the worse things about caring for a loved one who has a terminal illness is the sense of isolation that you feel.  As the main caregiver, I began to feel overwhelmed by everything.  I needed help coping with my own grief but there never seemed to be anytime to just sit down and cry.

That is when I contacted Hospice for help.  The volunteer that was assigned to me was truly incredible. Let me tell you what she did.

• She listened (non-judgmentally) when I need to talk.
• She helped me get groceries,  picked up medicine at the drug store when I couldn't get out 
• When I was physically/emotionally & spiritually exhausted, she stayed with my niece so I could get completely away from everything for a few hours, thus giving me time to regenerated so I could carry on.
• She talked to my niece, read her the bible when she wanted, gave her medicine, sat quietly with her when she didn't want to talk but didn't want to be alone.
• When I finally placed my niece into Palliative Care, your volunteer visited us at the hospital and continued to offer comfort & support.
• When I was particularly stressed about making funeral arrangements she offered to come with me. I don't know how I would have managed without her support.
• When it was over she showed up at the funeral parlor to offer her condolences to the family and just before I returned home she visited one more time to wish me well, and inform me  that grief counseling was available when/if I felt that I might need it.

Many wonderful people provided help to my niece & I for her physical needs as her health continued to deteriorate.  Only Hospice offered emotional & spiritual support. Only Hospice offered materials explaining how to tell children of different ages about a parent's coming death...or the different challenges that my niece & I would be facing as her illness progressed. (The Caregivers Guide and How Do I Cope?).

While medical assistance is crucial when one is ill that alone is not enough. All aspects of a person's health need to be dealt with during a time of crisis for these are equally important. Hospice provided that help by focusing on a human being, by offering support & caring in a world that had suddenly become very hostile. 

Reflecting back over the past two months, I know that because of the kindness & compassion that Hospice offered to my niece and me, it was a little easier for us to get through what was the worse experience of our lives. If she were alive today, I know she would thank you herself for treating her as a person, not just a person with Cancer.

Hospice provides a much needed service to seriously ill people and their families and yet many people still do not know about it. I can only image this must be because of lack of funding because anyone who has heard of it has nothing but good things to say. 

Sincerely,
A Grateful Aunt

May 2007

In December 2005, my husband Kempton was told his Leukemia was terminal. We felt as though someone had pulled the rug out from under our feet. We weren’t ready for this. We were retired and had a good life. We did a lot of traveling and all at once we couldn’t make plans any more. We thought that this was something that happened to other families – not to us. But, it did.

I wasn’t prepared for being a caregiver and facing the rest of my life without Kempton. In one moment, everything changed. I felt numb, as if someone had hit me over the head. I was stunned. Our happy, carefree life suddenly revolved around appointments and trips to the hospital; preparing wills and making funeral arrangements; and, waiting for someone else to tell us what to do.

As Kempton grew more ill, he began to sleep a lot and I began to feel very isolated and lonely. I read a lot and looked for information everywhere to help. That is when I called Hospice. I needed someone to talk to and to share my burden with. It was the best call I made.

Hospice had a Day Program for Kempton and a Family Caregiver Lunch & Learn Program for me. Once a week, I brought Kempton to the Hospice House for the day. He enjoyed the special lunches, complimentary therapy and heart-felt discussions with the volunteers and staff. He told them stories of his life and shared his regrets and special memories. There were tears of sadness along with much laughter and fun. Kempton fully lived on the days he came to Hospice and I had a day off to rest and rejuvenate.

I attended the Hospice Caregiver Lunch & Learn Program and found it to be very educational and supportive. I enjoyed meeting the other caregivers, sharing stories and all the support offered to me. The guest speakers who came to this program were wonderful. I learned important life skills - like how to cope with Christmas. Dr. Chris O’Brien’s session on pain and symptom management and advance care planning was particularly helpful.

Hospice helped us cope with the final months of Kempton’s life before he died on March 12, 2007. I am now attending their Grief Support Group and plan to join the Friends of Hospice in the future to thank them and support their work.

Few of us are prepared to face a life threatening illness, caregiving or the loss of a loved one. Don’t try to do it alone. Call Hospice - they can help.

Sincerely,
Kathy Crawford
Loving Wife